Autumn says the darndest things

Last Monday, John watched Autumn and Luke play at the big Tree house in the University Mall while Amanda and I shopped. This is John's story.

Autumn, ever the fantastical fairy tale princess, chronically falls asleep and needs a prince to wake her up. Evidently Luke must be the prince that does the kissing trick, and that just wasn't good enough today. As John told Luke to be that prince and go wake up his sister princess, she looked around and saw a sweet two-year-old boy, pointed, and exclaimed in a commanding tone to uncle John, "No, I want that ONE!" (That's not what uncles are for Autumn...)

Later on we drove over to the ReStore, a second hand parts store operated by Habitat for Humanity. John and I had decided to make that the last stop of the day so that we wouldn't bore the kids. Basically we would part ways before going to the store. However, it turned out Amanda needed to guide us to the hidden store. Since they were there Amanda and Autumn went in and used the bathroom while John looked for pieces of molding. Somehow I must have told Autumn during the day that the last stop would be at a junk store, but I don't remembering saying that. When they came back out to leave, Autumn asked politely if she could go with me into John's Junk Club. Hee hee. Of course, John, you have a junk club! (And she liked it...perhaps she's got the makings of an artist in her...no doubt).

So that didn't end up being the last stop, we then went to Harbor Freight Tools and I waited in the car with the kids while Amanda and John ran once last errand. Amanda had purchased some nail polish that looked just like ice cream cones. Of course Autumn wanted to "see" them. But the kicker is I wanted to "see" them too. We both refrained from opening up the bottles in the car and painting nails.

During this time an old man with a full gray and white beard drove up and parked in the handicapped spot right next to us. I thought he looked like Santa Claus and because kids amuse me I asked Autumn, "do you think that man is Santa Claus? You should ask him". Not sure what she'd do with this suggestion, I watched. First, she started tapping on the interior window with the ice cream cone polish. I stopped it right away, no need for a broken window. But the man did not see her, nor was he getting out of his car. I didn't see how she was going to get his attention short of getting out of the car and tapping on his window, an option I wouldn't allow. I let the idea go.

He finally got out of the car. Quicker than I could think or realize, Autumn had the power window down, and politely asked, "Mister, are you Santa Claus?" It was so sincere and polite and the word MISTER? where did that come from? The man was pleasant and said that would be his secret. So she rolled up the window apparently to think about the answer. Then as soon as it was up, it came down again and with her you-really-gotta-tell-me voice declared, "You sure looked like Santa Claus, are you sure you aren't Santa Claus?..." I didn't hear the rest of the conversation that continued, because at that moment John and Amanda had returned. Thanks a lot guys. I was having fun.

Okay another day. The Espersens came out to our house for the Nativity Night we did on December 21, 2010. They were getting ready to go over to stay at great Grandma Blacks house for the night when she cornered John in the following conversation that I eavesdropped through a doorway and observed.

"Uncle John, can I borrow this (referring to a costume item from that night)"
NO
"I will bring it back, I only want to borrow it"
"NO Autumn its not mine to give."

It was my item and she had done a good job of convincing me, I would have capitulated, but this was John's conversation. Then she started pointing to other items asking the same question with similar intensity. Her plea continually met with a NO. I observed no whining, no crying, nor pouting. This was sheer negotiation. With her body erect and hands in a hip power position, she said, "Well, there's got to be something you don't want". At that moment John's mischievous wheels were turning as he matter-of-fact said there was something he didn't want.

Never to outguess John, I had to follow them to the patio where John was storing the remnants of that weekend's remodel project. He grabbed a long piece of metal electrical conduit and said, "you can have this, Autumn" (He thought he had her now).

Ever the creative girl and in full sincerity and excitement she exclaimed "WE CAN BUILD A TENT!" Luke realized the greatness of the find and hoisted the other end of the pole above his head and without hesitation she and he started toward the car. Never mind that the pole was not going to fit in the car, spatial relationships don't apply when you are given something great. John, had been bested.

Rest of the story. Obviously moms don't like Uncle John gifts, so John quickly took the conduit and told them he would store it at our house for them to play with. Fortunately, that worked.

Darling kids. So creative and optimistic.